Opinion | A Modest Proposal - TCI

Editor's Note: This is the first of two complementary opinion pieces by Paladin examining traffic and transportation in the Turks and Caicos Islands. A second article, focusing on the role of driver behaviour and road courtesy, will be published tomorrow.

Let me talk to you straight, as if you’re sitting in my living room with a cup of bush tea. We all know Providenciales has a traffic problem. What we cannot agree on is why it exists or what to do about it. So let me wade in — not timidly, not politely, but with a proposal that could actually fix the mess we’re in if we had the courage to act.

Seventeen miles of contiguous roadway does not make a highway. It is simply a long road, and the speed limit needs to come down. Everyone needs to slow down. You are not on a drag strip. You are not auditioning for Fast & Furious: Blue Hills Drift. And yes, that includes the airport taxis racing back for the next fare. That foolishness has to stop.

Now here is where I get immodest. Let’s take a hard look at the so‑called median running down the center of the highway. After twenty years, what do we have to show for it? Not a garden. Not a beautification project. Just a sunbaked, weed‑infested eyesore. So let’s remove it. In its place, we build alternating tram stops along the roadway, flowing straight into Blue Hills. The space already exists; the Millennium Highway was designed for four lanes. Remove the median, adjust the sidewalks, and suddenly there is room for a tram or trolley system running down the spine of Provo.

This does not require elevated platforms, fancy walkovers, or billion‑dollar overengineering. It requires simple, staggered pedestrian crossings where drivers slow down — like civilized human beings — to let people board the tram.

Each crossing must have real rules and real enforcement. Every tram stop gets a two‑color light system: green for drivers to proceed, red with a walk symbol for pedestrians to cross. When the red light appears, drivers stop. Full stop. No negotiation. No excuses. And because we know how people behave when they think no one is watching, each crossing gets enforcement cameras — the same type used in Canada and other countries. These cameras capture your licence plate, your vehicle, and your face. The DMV already has your email. Within three days, you receive a fine and summons. Ignore three summonses and your licence is suspended. Real change only happens when punishment is immediate and certain.

Since we are removing the lamp poles, we replace them with proper lighting on the outer edges of the road — metal poles strong enough to hold digital billboards. These screens can display hurricane warnings, accident reroutes, missing persons alerts, community announcements, holiday messages, congratulations for our athletes and ambassadors, and yes, paid advertising that sends revenue straight into the Treasury. Imagine our Miss Universe contestant returning home with her face lighting up the entire highway. That is national pride, not clutter.

Now let’s talk about sidewalks — real ones. Not the oversized slabs we have now, but right‑sized sidewalks that double as caps for a U‑shaped concrete conduit system. This trough carries stormwater to a holding pond or the ocean, prevents flooding after heavy rain, houses waterproof tubing for power, water, phone, and internet lines, and charges every private utility a monthly fee to use it. It can be built right here in TCI using simple molds and allows technicians to access lines without digging up the road every six months. One structure solves multiple problems: local manufacturing, government revenue, better infrastructure, and fewer disruptions.

Now the tram itself. To use it, you do not need cash. You buy a TCI Transit Card from a vending machine using a debit or credit card. Tap on, tap off. Eventually, the same card works for buses, water taxis, and the full mass‑transit network. And because we are Turks Islanders, the tram will earn its own nickname — Banana Express, Coco Loco, something playful and ours. We should embrace it, brand it, and make it an experience.

Mass movement is not new to us. Years ago, we had a bus called The Iguana that ran hourly between Turtle Cove and Grace Bay for two dollars a ride. Taxi drivers recommended it proudly. We had the seed of the idea; we simply never expanded it into an island‑wide system.

Once the main tram line is running, we expand into Five Cays, South Dock, Kew Town, Long Bay, Grace Bay, and Leeward. Every community becomes connected. Every resident gains an alternative to driving. Every tourist avoids the white‑knuckle taxi ride of their life. Traffic slows. Accidents drop. Gasoline bills shrink. Pedestrians and cyclists stop risking their lives. And the entire island becomes more beautiful, more organized, and more modern.

When Turks Islanders travel abroad, they queue properly, obey speed limits, wait for the bus or train, and follow the rules of the road. So why can’t we do the same here at home? It is not that we cannot. It is that we do not want to — until someone forces us. This project requires leadership that is part benevolent, part tyrant, because sometimes you must save people from themselves.

And yes, the money. I can already hear the objections: “Paladin, this sounds expensive.” Of course it is. All public works are. But if we are debating borrowing $380 million and spending $400 million on the airport, then surely we can allocate $50–60 million a year to a five‑year capital project that fixes traffic, ends flooding, beautifies the island, improves safety, creates revenue, and modernizes our transportation system. That is not an expense. That is an investment.

So tell me — how modest is this proposal, really? Because from where I’m sitting, it sounds like common sense wrapped in courage. And if we do not start thinking boldly, creatively, and unapologetically, we will still be here ten years from now, arguing about the same traffic on the same seventeen‑mile “highway” that never was.